Micah The Mountain : Origins
Chapter I
In the beginning there was the creation of the universe and with it was the big bang. All types of colours and elements were formed at that split second in time. Along with the formation of the universe came the formation of one of the most unique creations known to man, The Celestial Mustache. Form out the elements of light, beauty, and strength, came this mustache from the clouds of explosions in the sky and with it, it was good. Knowledge of this mustache was passed down through the ages making the dream of man to one day explore the stars and find it. But one day there was a man named Xenu who possessed an evil power and lust to control the universe, and he did. One day finding the mustache, he surgically attached it to his face giving himself the ultimate power. In his Galactic Confederacy he made it a decree to have all mustaches for women and men, the women would have to take anabolic steroids to increase their testosterone, and children had ones drawn in with hand at a young age and sometimes leading to brain damage from the high content of chemicals emitted from markers. With over population and disarray amongst the stars, the universe seemed like a dark and scary place until someone decided to step up and fight against Xenu.
Scholars said that a great battle ensued and after a Douglas DC-8 crashed into Xenu's spaceship, he was destroyed. The remaining parts of his body and hairs from his ultimate mustache were scattered all across the universe to make sure that he would never regain power again. Each part was specifically put in a solar system, and for Earth's disposal was the mustache. The impact of Xenu's mustache hair being spread across the Earth caused a mass eruption of various volcanos releasing toxic gases and thetans into the atmosphere causing many species, including the dinosaurs, to become extinct paving the way for the future of the humans.
To prevent the Earth from being destroyed again, there was a drastic measure to be take place to stop the mountains from once again erupting and destroying the Earth. The keepers of peace went around to the mountains sprinkling the elements of earth, water, and spirit to keep the mountains at ease and limit the growth of their mustaches. All was going fine until there was one special mustache that wouldn't stop growing.
Over the course of a million years, one mountain began to form in a way that no one else would expect it to. Growing its own eyes, hands, mouth, and mustache, it was as if this mountain was coming alive.
At the Scientology headquarters in Los Angeles, California one night, L. Ron Hubbard came to John Travota in his sleep and told him. "Hello John, it appears the mountain from Xenu's stash keeps on growing and growing, if we don't take action, his mustache will become so big it will flood the entire earth!"
Waking up from his dream, John Travolta went out to the mountain range where the mountain was and ordered that it must be transfered in a confined space where they can observe it and do experiments.
"We shall call it project Micah, and hey, I'm John Travolta!" said John Travolta.
With the money that he made from the movie Hairspray, he managed to use those funds to transport such a large object to a top secret lavatory located in Salt Lake city. There, Micah was fast asleep, unaware of his own existence and mustache.
In the beginning there was the creation of the universe and with it was the big bang. All types of colours and elements were formed at that split second in time. Along with the formation of the universe came the formation of one of the most unique creations known to man, The Celestial Mustache. Form out the elements of light, beauty, and strength, came this mustache from the clouds of explosions in the sky and with it, it was good. Knowledge of this mustache was passed down through the ages making the dream of man to one day explore the stars and find it. But one day there was a man named Xenu who possessed an evil power and lust to control the universe, and he did. One day finding the mustache, he surgically attached it to his face giving himself the ultimate power. In his Galactic Confederacy he made it a decree to have all mustaches for women and men, the women would have to take anabolic steroids to increase their testosterone, and children had ones drawn in with hand at a young age and sometimes leading to brain damage from the high content of chemicals emitted from markers. With over population and disarray amongst the stars, the universe seemed like a dark and scary place until someone decided to step up and fight against Xenu.
Scholars said that a great battle ensued and after a Douglas DC-8 crashed into Xenu's spaceship, he was destroyed. The remaining parts of his body and hairs from his ultimate mustache were scattered all across the universe to make sure that he would never regain power again. Each part was specifically put in a solar system, and for Earth's disposal was the mustache. The impact of Xenu's mustache hair being spread across the Earth caused a mass eruption of various volcanos releasing toxic gases and thetans into the atmosphere causing many species, including the dinosaurs, to become extinct paving the way for the future of the humans.
To prevent the Earth from being destroyed again, there was a drastic measure to be take place to stop the mountains from once again erupting and destroying the Earth. The keepers of peace went around to the mountains sprinkling the elements of earth, water, and spirit to keep the mountains at ease and limit the growth of their mustaches. All was going fine until there was one special mustache that wouldn't stop growing.
Over the course of a million years, one mountain began to form in a way that no one else would expect it to. Growing its own eyes, hands, mouth, and mustache, it was as if this mountain was coming alive.At the Scientology headquarters in Los Angeles, California one night, L. Ron Hubbard came to John Travota in his sleep and told him. "Hello John, it appears the mountain from Xenu's stash keeps on growing and growing, if we don't take action, his mustache will become so big it will flood the entire earth!"
Waking up from his dream, John Travolta went out to the mountain range where the mountain was and ordered that it must be transfered in a confined space where they can observe it and do experiments.
"We shall call it project Micah, and hey, I'm John Travolta!" said John Travolta.
With the money that he made from the movie Hairspray, he managed to use those funds to transport such a large object to a top secret lavatory located in Salt Lake city. There, Micah was fast asleep, unaware of his own existence and mustache.
To Be Continued...
Check Back Next Saturday For Chapter II ! ! !
Promote the Mustache... Save the world
- Micah The Mountain
Check Back Next Saturday For Chapter II ! ! !
Promote the Mustache... Save the world
- Micah The Mountain
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